Little Lessons Learned Along the Way: Life as a Student, Teacher, Wife, Mom, and New Dog Owner

I am not a morning person.  I get up later than I should.  I leave for work as late as I feel comfortable, and that time slides back as the year goes on.  My children are self-sufficient.  Jake is at college so I don’t have to worry about him.  Luke is a junior in high school so my only job is to make sure that he is awake in time to catch the bus or to make his way down the hall to his computer.    The morning was as simple as it could be.  I say “was” because my family adopted a puppy in May 2020.  I was at the point in my life that no one relied on me in the morning.  Now Rory relies on me. In the morning.   I am not good at mornings - did I say that already? I have tried various arrangements of my morning routine to see what works and gets me into work on time.  Old routine - wake up at 6:45, shower & get dressed, do hair, grab stuff leave house at 7:30, arrive at 8:00, 40 minutes before sign in. New routine -...

I am on a high.  A natural, nerdy high, that is.   I just completed a workshop about how to help struggling readers.  As a former classroom teacher of fifth and third graders, learning about the mechanics of how to read has been a long journey for me.  When someone suggested this topic, I was slightly hesitant, wondering what insights I had to offer.  I know I am a literacy coach, but, again, my experience is in the upper grades.  But - I am a nerd.  I love to learn.  I have spent a considerable amount of time learning about the Science of Reading and TCRWP strategies to teach early reading skills.  I have been working  on learning about the instructional gaps that are holding our students back and making plans for filling in those gaps - considering regular years, not just this Covid year.   I was lucky enough to have some money set aside that I was able to use to purchase supplemental materials that I talked about in the pre...

29 Days of writing!  This is a record for me.  I am excited that I have blogged every day and done my three comments.  I really have learned so much from reading the other blogs and from the comments on my blog. It’s funny - some days I have a topic in mind and the writing comes easily.  Other days, I have no idea and have to sit and figure something out.  Bonus points if I figure out a topic for the next day that I actually write down!  Sometimes I am thinking I will go one way and then the writing takes a turn.  For the better or worse, I have no idea.   As a writing teacher, these are all of the ideas I have been discussing with my kids.  It’s funny to watch them in real life in real time, and now I feel like I have a better foundation to hold a discussion about the writing process.   Will I still write every day starting April 1st?  Probably not.  But I really want to keep up a writing habit on a regular basis....

In January 2020 my family was in a Las Vegas mall when we heard gunshots at a store 200 feet in front of us. The boys were separated from us, on the way to the bathroom. Scott and I ran like all the other terrified customers, while desperately calling and texting them to see where they were and if they were ok. We ran into a store closing its doors and hunkered down in the back.  We found out the boys’ location - safe outside the mall, and the brave and selfless manager of the store led us through the back hallways to the boys. We darted from doorway to doorway, listening for more gunshots.  At one point she put us in a service elevator and two men jumped in with us. Scared, but utterly determined to get back to our kids, we rode the elevator with the two men who were obviously terrified as well.  We ran out of the mall and grabbed the boys. I held them for a full minute while I sobbed uncontrollably.  The worst moment of my life followed by the best.  We were l...

At our school another teacher and I started a group for staff members to attend and talk about stress, emotions, and ways to nurture themselves.  We share our frustrations and share our strategies.  So we were talking about what to do when we are excessively frustrated with a student.  My mind flashed back to 18 years ago when I had “Ben” in fifth grade.  Ben was quiet and high energy.  He was a super sweet kid, and I enjoyed having him in my class.  Ben had ADHD and his parents had decided to medicate him.  Now Ben had decided that there were days that he didn’t want to take his medication and had devised clever strategies to get rid of the pill and not alert his mother. On his medication, his focus was better and motor activity less.  Off his medication, his focus was very low and his motor activity was very high.  Let’s just say there was lots of running on those days.  Lots.  So one day was super tough.  He had ditched his ...

My 16 year-old son is a planner.   When he was young, he loved to decide which activities would take place at family parties.  I vividly remember the “Minute to Win It” party - strapping a tissue box filled with ping pong balls to my uncle’s back to see if he could shake them out in a minute.  He did.  I remember the following year playing wiffleball with the grandparents on the front lawn.  It was fun to tag my dad out. Every Christmas he most looked forward to buying us gifts at the Holiday Gift Shop at school.  I kid you not when I say that was his favorite day of the school year.  Days before he would have a list of whom he was buying for.  When he came home, the list had little check marks and Luke was carrying a bag full of beautifully wrapped, chosen-with-love presents.   Last night he popped downstairs and handed me a list.  Since he is a junior in high school, he has been thinking long and hard about college.  The...

One of my husband’s favorite Luke (16 year-old) stories involves a metal pot.  One day Scott was cooking dinner, and I heard, “What the heck?”  When I got there, I saw this:   The boys, then 8 years old and 11 years old were called to the kitchen.  With a smile on his face, my husband said, “What happened?”   Luke piped up, “The handle came off when I was making mac and cheese.  I fixed it!” Big grin on his face.  He had done it all by himself without asking for any help.  Scott thanked him for taking care of the pot, and the boys were dismissed. Nine years later, that pot handle is still upside down.  Not to make fun of Luke, but because it put a smile on Scott’s face.  It still does put a smile on his face.  Instead of leaving broken pieces of whatever for Dad, someone took initiative and fixed it.  And Scott appreciated that, even if the fix was slightly off.  Lesson learned:  People often appreciate your effo...

“You have one more minute to play before we have to go home.”  “5-4-3-2-1, let’s go. If you were to hear those sentences, you would probably infer that I was talking to a child.  Strangely enough, you would be wrong. My children are teenagers;  I have not spoken to them like this in many, many years. I was talking to my dog, Rory. My husband and I are educators.  I swear being a teacher runs in your blood, and you can’t turn it off, especially if you were an elementary school teacher. From time to time I automatically switch to teacher voice and teacher things come out of my mouth without thinking.  Rory is not the best walker in the world.  She loves to sniff around.  Maybe she has some hound in her, I don’t know.  But there are long stretches of our walks when her nose is a centimeter off the ground.  (I am always so fascinated.  What information can she get from her sniffing?)  And a leaf pile?  Forget it!  She could st...

I live in the woods but am not really an outdoorsy girl by nature - a play on words!  I have hiked multiple times and camped outside with my children’s Cub Scout pack, but this was not my first choice of activities.  So a few years ago, a group of friends decided to plan a camping trip  - hike ten miles and then sleep in a tent and then hike ten miles back. Luckily one of the husbands was dropping off the equipment at the campsite, so all we really had to do was carry minor things for the ten miles.  I don’t know what I was thinking.  I run five miles regularly so I thought hiking ten miles would be easy, especially with friends.  That was a ridiculously long walk even with fabulous company.  The last few miles I pulled a muscle in my calf.  Not too bad, but that even lessened my desire to hike ten miles back to the cars in the morning.  And I previously had no idea what walking poles are really for.  I absolutely found out.  Gravi...

Choose to be open or closed. It’s up to you how you choose to approach things.  This is the gist of the chapter of the book I am reading.   I know there is more to it, but I read it in small chunks right before I go to bed, and this was last night’s chunk.  It was from a book that Judd Apatow told Brene Brown about when he was on her podcast.   The book is called The Untethered Soul by Michael Alan Singer.   Judd brought it up when he was talking about how his mind is always on, trying to solve problems that he might or might not have. I completely could identify with his description.  I am worried about what to do with Rory, our one year old puppy, when I go to work for full days in September.  September problem that consumes my mind right now.  (sigh) So I have not quite gotten the answer about how to stop my mind from solving future problems, but I came across this idea of choosing to be open or closed.  I am an introvert who usually has a...

It was a tough Saturday.    Going to a memorial service for a 19 year-old, and seeing your son in many of the pictures with the teenager who died gives you pause.   Hearing surviving friends, college roommates, and even a college dean talk about this amazing person with so much promise and filled with light gives you the sense that we lost someone very special.  (And we truly did lose someone very special - as beautiful as she was on the outside, she was exponentially more beautiful on the inside.)   Watching her parents, calm and collected, surrounded by close family, unable to speak at the service, makes you feel utterly heartbroken.  Heartbroken for the  child they lost.  Heartbroken for the future they lost.  Heartbroken for the answer to the question - How do you go on from here?  I can’t imagine remembering to breathe, let alone trying to put a life back together that has some semblance of normal. Lesson learned:...

My dog has no grit.  It’s sad but true.  I totally mean it in the educational sense - that stick-to-it-ness that pushes students to try difficult things and to persevere when things don’t go well the first time.  In order to keep her mentally stimulated as I worked on Zoom, I bought her a puzzle toy.  You put a treat inside each piece and then connect the pieces together.   Initially I connected them loosely on the easiest setting so she would get the concept and could break them apart easily.  I wanted her to see success.   She got her treats and was happy.  The game has changed. Lately I have been connecting them fully - on the easiest setting - so they make a line (bottom right picture).  I don’t help anymore.  Well, the second she starts to play with them, she starts to whine. Before she has tried anything.  I have no pity for this girl.  Sometimes later in the day by accident she picks it up and drops them which opens them...

I lie to myself.  Every day.  Multiple times.   Tomorrow you will get up at 6:15 and not look at your phone or hit the snooze button.  Lies - I got out of bed at 6:35 after two snooze hits and looked at Facebook just to procrastinate. You can take a five minute shower and be dressed by 6:45.  Lies - I was dressed around 6:53. I can start Rory’s walk at 7:10.  Lie - I left my bedroom at 7:11. You can make it to work on time by 8:40.  Truth.  I was in the parking lot at 8:35. You will stay within your calorie range today.  BIG LIE - I was making chocolate chip cookies and probably ate at least four before they hit the oven.  (I can’t be expected to not eat cookie dough.  What kind of person would I be if I didn’t taste test the cookies before I gave them away?) Lights will be out by 10:30. Lie - I had to finish my book club book, and then I wanted to send a text to my son at college.  Then he responded so I had to see that, ...

“She’s not my dog.  She’s your dog.”  I hear this every day at least once from my husband, Scott.  It doesn’t matter that Rory’s tail does circles when Scott comes home from work. It doesn’t matter that Scott bought her a special harness and leash to use when she goes running with him. It doesn’t matter that Scott puts table food in her bowl when he thinks I’m not looking. It doesn’t matter that she snuggles her whole body next to him on the couch at night. It doesn’t matter that last night he got up from the couch to get a drink from the basement, and Rory stood at the top of the stairs and CRIED until she saw him. It doesn’t matter that Scott baked her special dog treats from scratch. It doesn’t matter that he posts more pictures about Rory on Facebook than I do. She’s my dog.  Right.  Uh-huh. Lesson learned: My hubby has a soft spot for Rory - something he never could have predicted before having a dog.

Someone once described teenagerhood as always wanting to go one step further that their mother is comfortable going.  That is probably the most accurate description I have ever heard.   I know I am a worrier, but I feel like I give my kids a lot of latitude as long as they show good judgement and are truthful.  Even so, they are normal kids, and they want freedom.  It’s funny - recently I have realized that my older son, Jake, has learned how to work the system (and probably has been working the system for years).  If he asks for something and at least one parent says, “no,” with certainty that there is no room for a change of mind, it’s a no.  However, if I (the more cautious person) am unsure and want to think about it, and Dad has not given a no, the game begins.  Jake then mentions the question periodically.  Not pushing, but checking on the status of the decision.  He knows not to push.  “OK, let me know.”  The dishes are ...

I just pressed send on an email to colleagues about a workshop I will be facilitating with another teacher. The presenting teacher is excellent at helping little ones learn how to read using multisensory techniques.  I think she is going to provide the teachers with really useful information, and I look forward to working with her on this project.  All day I have been working on the advertisement.  Should I say “Good for readers who struggle with reading texts at levels A-D? A-E?  Higher?”   I know some people have strong feelings about leveled texts, but I really wanted to give the teachers information to help them decide if they should attend.  Readers can struggle at an “M”, but our information isn’t going to be terribly helpful for them.   So I went back and forth.  From my morning shower until 3:00. I started the Google Slide advertisement, put our Bitmojis on it, and then looked at the areas that we will address in the workshop - blending.....